Why not masturbate?

I was in a supermarket the other day when I witnessed a pre-school age child delve into their underpants for a bit of a play.  Mum was underwhelmed and immediately told the kid to stop, to which the kid asked 'why?'.  I was with the kid wanting to hear Mum's explanation too, but I only got the quintessentially parental 'because!'.  It's no wonder we grow up thinking masturbation is a bad thing.

Stop doing that!

As an infant and small child, feel and touch is how you learn about your body and developmental milestones are linked to that self-exploration.  You touch, taste, poke and prod everything and through doing so learn what feels (and tastes) good and what doesn't.  Penises and clitoruses are sensitive from birth, and children will come to discover for themselves that some parts of their bodies are pleasurably sensitive long before they start to masturbate. Long before it becomes synonymous with something sexual, our relationship with our genitals is how we learned to self soothe, and that self-discovery is amongst the means by which we learn unconditional self-love. 

You have to feel sorry for the little kids who end up getting a blast from a grown-up for innocently discovering 'inappropriately'.  How confusing would it be to be allowed to discover some body parts, but not others?  'Mummy, I can touch my toes!' ... 'clever girl'.  'Mummy, I can stretch my penis!' ... 'put it away!' or possibly, whack! 

Hormones change everything at puberty when that self-discovery takes on a sexual side.  The bits which have long been known to feel nice suddenly feel really good and well worthy of some non-cursory interest.  Perhaps only occasionally or perhaps a lot, but that masturbation is as much a development milestone in adolescents as that self-discovery is in infants and toddlers.  With that in mind, you really want for parents to encourage that development, not stifle it or worse.  Masturbation isn't something to be embarrassed or feel anxious about.  Like sex, it's part of life, not just during puberty, but throughout one's whole life.

When I think back on that mother and child in the supermarket, and the way she checked to see if anyone else had seen her child, it really looked like the mother was the one who needed a little solo time.  Presumably, she'd been brought up to believe that masturbation was dirty or embarrassing and there she was passing that mindset onto her child. Needless to say that I don't think that parent will be encouraging her children to enjoy their own body when they reach puberty, either.  Really, it's sad for the mum and unfortunate for the child to be repressed so much as to never be able to openly enjoy masturbation for what it is. 

Masturbation is not shameful or naughty or dirty or deviant or unnatural, far from it.  If your parents or religion have indoctrinated you otherwise, they have done you a disservice. It doesn't cause blindness, hairy palms, sexual dysfunction (quite the opposite actually), and it absolutely isn't a sign of some disorder.  Any 'authority' who tries to convince you differently more than likely also believes the earth is flat, climate change is a myth or is a Trump supporter.

In fact, masturbation a perfectly natural, harmless and safe way for you to explore yourself sexually.  For your efforts, your body will reward you with the release of feel-good hormones, endorphins, you'll learn what lights your fire and invariably clear your head with some sexual tension relieving 'me-time'.   You'll also improve the quality of your sleep, reduce stress, improve your self-esteem, etc etc etc ...and it's non-fattening and there's no risk of STD's or pregnancy.  Enjoy without guilt, regardless of your age, gender or relationship status.

If you're a parent, I sincerely hope you have the wisdom to look at your role in teaching your kids about masturbation, particularly in light of how you were brought up.  Kids need to learn that it's OK, but one of those things probably best done in private.  Whether you're a parent or not, take some time out for some solo-time.  You'll feel better for it.


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Of course, Top Drawer Essentials has a great range of toys and masturbation aids to suit men and women.  Sure, your hand might have got you this far but you owe it to yourself to enjoy our masturbators for men and vibrators for the ladies (battery, rechargeable and mains powered).  We only stock quality products and of course we ship throughout Australia. While you're here, you can also stock up your top drawer with condoms, dams, lubricants, dildos, plugs, cockrings, balls and eggs, and more. We've even got a referral program so you can help your friends find that essential for their top drawer, too.

And yes, Top Drawer Essentials can offer suggestions if you like. After all, we are all about safe sex, solo sex, fun sex and better sex.

Email us

You can always email us questions: concierge@TopDrawerEssentials.com.au


Image credit: Photo by Sharon McCutcheon from Pexels


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