Enough with the flowers and chocolates!

The dust has now settled after Valentine's day, that beautiful day to celebrate romance and love... and based on the abundance of articles like 'Valentine's Day is a trap you don't even know you're in' it seems many people consider it amongst the most stressful times of the year.  Some will have embraced it (and let's be honest that many shunned it as a poorly veiled push for consumerism), mindful that it's one of the 365 days in the year where you were liable to be scrutinised in your relationship.  Newsflash people, if you didn't buy into Valentine's day, the reality is you were still likely to be scrutinised... particularly if your partner wasn't really totally on board with the idea of ignoring it as just another day.  Let's face it ... it's stressful whether you were on the receiving end or the giving end.  Perhaps the stress was about "I hope this is good enough", "I hope my partner gets it", or maybe "what the hell am I going to get this time".  It's also hard to escape being compared to past debacles or successes... even from past relationships.

Enough with the flowers and chocolates 

There are some among us who were planning what they were going to do for months.  We call them 'bastards'.  They are the ones destined to make their partner feel guilty, their friends feel jealous, and the partners of their friends feel inadequate.  They are the ones whose bosses should be wondering where they found the time to source genuine mermaid tears bath salts, a flash mob with pan flutes playing their partner's favourite tunes and some Himalayan flower which hasn't otherwise bloomed since the day they met.  Hopefully, the police will now have them under suspicion as to how they could afford it too.

Let me guess.  You defended yourself by saying that you don't get into this Valentine's day thing, but then you hedged your bets and got flowers and chocolates, which was, of course, the worst thing to do.  It's as good as saying you are 100% on board with Valentine's day... but you didn't/don't think enough of your partner to bother with any effort.  Tell me I'm wrong.

You wanted to get nice flowers, overlooking the 50% markup in the weeks leading up to Valentine's day. The red rose was the benchmark by which your purchase would be measured, but thereafter you knew it's a purely arbitrary scale.  You pondered whether red roses are cliched and whether whatever your choice says the right thing about your relationship, too much or too little.  Are white roses more or less appropriate for your relationship?  Are some other kind of flower, provided they are red, a better choice, thereby representative of your special relationship and separating you from the herd?  The tendency was to purchase on-line, but then you figured you were going to be way better off visiting a florist to feel the stress of everyone else in the same situation.  The smell of fear of the wrong purchase overpowered the scents of the flowers, all amid the perpetual ka-ching of the cash registers.

Chocolates are the other old reliable.  Can't go wrong with chocolates your inner stress-monkey told you.  Yes, it's not about the money, but you couldn't help yourself from working out that the cost per gram of the good stuff rivalled the market price of cocaine. Hundreds of options, any or all of which may or may not taste better than a block of dairy milk, but this is not about what you think.  Your partner will surely recognise your efforts to choose the perfect sweet accompaniment and it has amazingly little to do with the taste, right?  Sure.  A big box or little box is the next quandary, both of which says something and potentially gives rise to stress.  A small box is synonymous with "you don't need the extra kilojoules", and a big box just means later stress for how you were an enabler for putting on a little extra weight.

Yes, there are lots of alternatives to flowers and choccies, each with their merits and foibles, but any of which were better than nothing. After all, it's the thought that counts, right? 

I think my biggest problem with flowers and chocolates is that if you get it right, trying hard to not overly emphasise the 'if', they don't last.  The chocolates will have you and your partner with a teased but not even temporarily satisfied sweet tooth, and the flowers will become that odd smell in the corner of the room before you know it.  Suffice to say, I don't really think your partner will remember the thought that went into the gift if they can't remember to record the chocolates in their calorie counting or they are the ones who need to deal with the mass of rotting foliage that was once exorbitantly overpriced cut flowers.

Yes I'm biased, but for me, it's easy to see why adult toys are a better option.  Nothing says I love you like an orgasm, and no matter how good the chocolate tastes, it just isn't going to get your partner there, and no flower I've seen is going to come close.  Toys last longer than chocolates or flowers, and your partner will most definitely see anything you choose as being evidence that you see them that way.  The thought really does count.  Here you have products which by their very nature encourage intimacy in your relationship... which does sound more than a little like what the whole Valentine's day thing is all about.  See my point?

The 'right' product will blow his or her mind, and even the 'wrong' product will earn you points for trying.  Remember, to establish that your purchase was perfect or missed the mark still requires some special time together, and regardless, the effort will be noticed and appreciated.  The worst thing that could happen is that you learn a little something about what your partner doesn't like (or perhaps a fun story not to be shared with anyone else), and the best thing could be a transformation in your intimacy.  Even if you 'fail', you succeed... it's always a way better option than choccies.

If we've got you thinking, yes, we always have suggestions, including some recommendations with our specially selected 'Valentines day gift ideas' collection.  Massage candles, toys to share, toys to explore, games to play and so much more.  It's just a small sample of what we've got in store, but it will get you started.

Want Free Shipping on your next order at Top Drawer Essentials? Just use discount code BetterThanChocolates at checkout.

Of course, Top Drawer Essentials has a great range of gift ideas to suit men and women, for Valentine's day ... or just because.  Favourites for the ladies, favourites for the guys and goodies for couples to share.  We've got vibrators for the ladies (battery, rechargeable and mains powered), and of all kinds, including Bullet Vibrators, Rabbit Vibrators, Clitoral Vibrators, Wand Vibrators, Egg Vibrators, Classic Vibrators and G-Spot Vibrators.  We've also got masturbators for men of all kinds (including hands free options, love dolls and machines), though perhaps he won't need one this Valentine's day. We only stock quality products and of course we ship throughout Australia. While you're here, you can also stock up your top drawer with condoms, dams, lubricants, dildos, plugs, cockrings, balls and eggs, and more. We've even got a referral program so you can help your friends find that essential for their top drawer.

And yes, Top Drawer Essentials can offer suggestions if you like. After all, we are all about safe sex, solo sex, fun sex and better sex.

Email us

You can always email us questions: concierge@TopDrawerEssentials.com.au

 Image credit: Photo by Kristina Paukshtite from Pexels


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